Pinoy Text Jokes

Ang Pasyente...
NARS: doc, bat tinanggihan nyo yung pasyente?
DR: alin, yung bakla?
NARS: opo. Baka sabihin namimili tayo, porket bading siya.
DR: ano naman raraspahin ko sa kanya?

Frog Prince???
FROG: what does my future hold?
fairy: you'll meet someone who wants to know everything about you.
FROG: great! Will I meet her in a party?
fairy: no. in biology class

things you don't want to hear during your own surgery:
- san yung gunting na bago? Bat may kalawang to?
- 10ml? may nakasurvive na ba dyan? Sabi ko 5ml lang!
- doc, ubos na po pala yung anesthesia.
- kanina pa bukas yung tiyan, asan yung pantahi?
- sunog! Sunog! Labas lahat!

Technical...
BOY: I know we are also matter we can't occupy the same space at the same time. Kaya aalis na lang ako.
GIRL: bakit ganun para tayong mga parallel lines, why can't we meet at the same point?
BOY: your verbs and actions are not correct that's why all of the subjects are affected.
GIRL: ayoko na. you've reached my boiling point. And now my heart is getting to its freezing point!

inspiring quote of the day:
"hindi ako tamad. Hindi ko lang alam kung saan ko ibubuhos kasipagan ko."